As I was looking through some of my old journals, I came across an entry that really spoke to me in my current state. It's funny to me how God uses situations that we go through in the past to help us in our future.
Once upon a time (Don't those four little words automatically peek your interest? It better! lol)......Like I was saying....Once upon a time, I was watching a movie with two of my friends. I had already seen the movie prior to watching it with them. Throughout the entire movie they kept talking and commenting on EVERY scene. Seriously, it was like every 30 seconds. Then, they would ask me what would happen next instead of waiting to figure it out on their own. Needless to say, I was extremely annoyed. In my head I was thinking- oh my goodness, just watch the movie!! It was that night I discovered a new pet peeve of mine. I hate when people talk during movies! lol
What was far more enlightening than me discovering a new fact about myself was, God totally spoke to me through that situation. He likened my pet peeve to my relationship with Him. He said that I need to wait for what He has for me and enjoy the ride. Don't stress about what is happening or what is going to happen next. Don't try to figure out the mystery of the story, because then it will ruin the thrill that comes with suspense. It is far more enjoyable to watch a movie without knowing what is about to happen next or without knowing the ending.
Often times, we are my nagging friends wanting to know what is taking place in the movie that is our lives. We worry about what happens next instead of patiently waiting for the story to unfold. How boring, if you ask me! I wonder why we continue to worry and get anxious when we know that the writer of our movie is the most creative, exciting, loving, innovative writer EVER! Why would we not be at peace or excited to wait for the next scene? It is an exhilarating thing to be in suspense. It's exciting to go about not knowing what will happen next- even though it may not feel like it all of the time.
God is the author of our stories. He wants us to rest in knowing that he knows what happens in the next scene and He is already there, ready to watch it/walk it out with us. Jeremiah 29:11 reminds us, "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." My guess is that we've all heard this verse a million times over, but that doesn't mean that it is played out or that it is not still true for YOU today! When does the word of God ever get old or played out? Never, in my opinion. He knows how it will all play out. His plans for us are good. Let us enjoy the ride.
Thankfully, God has tons more patience than I when it comes to people talking during a movie. But, I think we share the same sentiment....SHUTUP AND JUST WATCH! Now, if only I can not do to Him what annoys me so badly ;-)
The movie of our lives is absolutely Oscar award winning! So, let us pull up a chair next to our Omniscient Friend as we watch the story unfold before our eyes. But, let's try watching it with hearts full of hope and anticipation, not mouths full of worry and fear.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Perfectly Positioned
WARNING: This blog may be full of grammatical error, namely....tons of comma splices. I hope you grammarians can look past my faults-Jesus did! ;-)
If we don't learn how to be faithful in small things, how will we ever remain faithful when God entrusts us with bigger things?
For quite some time now I've had this dream on the inside of me to travel and worship lead and ultimately lead people into the presence of God. Well, I'm in college now and this dream is seemingly impossible; one, because I have no clue how to make it happen and two, my major couldn't be further from my dream. It's crazy! I sit in class sometimes thinking, why on earth am I majoring in counseling when I know that in my heart of hearts my desire is to worship. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I don't have a heart for hurting people. It's not that I don't genuinely care about other people's problems. My heart is to help, it really is. However, I don't believe I'm a good therapist. People tell me all of the time, "well, Kristin, that's why your're in school. You have to learn how to be a good therapist." While, I agree with their reasoning, I think that I've somehow talked myself out of the job-no matter how much I am learning.
I have many voices in my head (not to be mistaken for a schizophrenic) saying things like, "Why are you wasting scholarship money? Why are you wasting your parents money? Why are you wasting your time?" Perhaps, I could have used a better analogy to make me sound a little less psychotic. But, these are the question plaguing me.
Maybe I've reached some sort of 21-year-old crisis and the world is seemingly coming to an end or I've reached a 21-year-old milestone and I'm realizing that my life is just beginning- I'd like to believe the latter. Another theory could be that, I'm approaching my last year of my undergraduate studies and then I have to become a "real" adult. I've never had to be one of those-EVER! That's a daunting undertaking if you ask me. And lucky for me, I picked one of those degrees where I pretty much have to go to graduate school or the market is pretty much closed to me. YAY! More school....
God has a funny sense of humor though. While I was in the middle of studying for a test a couple weeks back, I was so frustrated thinking that I don't care, I'm not going to use this. I think that excuse is very juvenile- I used to say that for just about every math class in grade school. I mean, I didn't want to be a mathematician and I certainly don't want to be an accountant or anything. So, I always thought, "why do I have to take this?" Don't lie, you know you thought the same exact thing ;-) Anyways, God stopped me in the middle of my bad attitude and asked me, "If you don't learn how to be faithful in small things, how will you ever remain faithful when I entrust you with bigger things?" SLAP....in the face that is! It all hit me, if I trust that God is in control of my life and in control of every step that I take, then I should trust that I am right where I am suppose to be. Yes, I said it....School is exactly where I am suppose to be. I am perfectly positioned.
I need to be faithful with my school work, because this is exactly where God has me. This season won't last forever. And whether I dread my current season at times, its all for the "greater good." This reminds me of a certain verse in Romans, 8:28 to be exact. "8 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." I trust that God will use what I am learning to help out in seasons to come. It will all work together, I'm sure of it!
Psalm 121:3 is constantly on my heart, "3 He will not let your foot slip-he who watches over you will not slumber." I don't know what the future looks like, but I know that God is not asleep over my life. I need not worry about what is next or how my dreams will come into fruition. Life is about taking it a day at a time. I choose to rest in the sovereignty of God. And if the things that I dream do not come true "to a T", I know that God is able to direct me along the path of His perfect will for my life. So, I say make YOUR dreams my dreams, Lord.
I leave you with a "Kristin-ism":
"At the end of the day, if I didn't get what I wanted it doesn't mean that God has forsaken me. If anything, it should confirm the fact that he is still here. His thoughts and ways are higher, therefore what I wanted is nothing compared to His plans for me."
If I didn't drive my point home, perhaps Britt Nicole's chorus of "Have Your Way" will help me in summation.
"So I'll stop searching for the answers, I'll stop praying for an escape. And I'l trust you God with where I am and believe that you will have your way. Just have your way, just have your way."
-Kristin
If we don't learn how to be faithful in small things, how will we ever remain faithful when God entrusts us with bigger things?
For quite some time now I've had this dream on the inside of me to travel and worship lead and ultimately lead people into the presence of God. Well, I'm in college now and this dream is seemingly impossible; one, because I have no clue how to make it happen and two, my major couldn't be further from my dream. It's crazy! I sit in class sometimes thinking, why on earth am I majoring in counseling when I know that in my heart of hearts my desire is to worship. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I don't have a heart for hurting people. It's not that I don't genuinely care about other people's problems. My heart is to help, it really is. However, I don't believe I'm a good therapist. People tell me all of the time, "well, Kristin, that's why your're in school. You have to learn how to be a good therapist." While, I agree with their reasoning, I think that I've somehow talked myself out of the job-no matter how much I am learning.
I have many voices in my head (not to be mistaken for a schizophrenic) saying things like, "Why are you wasting scholarship money? Why are you wasting your parents money? Why are you wasting your time?" Perhaps, I could have used a better analogy to make me sound a little less psychotic. But, these are the question plaguing me.
Maybe I've reached some sort of 21-year-old crisis and the world is seemingly coming to an end or I've reached a 21-year-old milestone and I'm realizing that my life is just beginning- I'd like to believe the latter. Another theory could be that, I'm approaching my last year of my undergraduate studies and then I have to become a "real" adult. I've never had to be one of those-EVER! That's a daunting undertaking if you ask me. And lucky for me, I picked one of those degrees where I pretty much have to go to graduate school or the market is pretty much closed to me. YAY! More school....
God has a funny sense of humor though. While I was in the middle of studying for a test a couple weeks back, I was so frustrated thinking that I don't care, I'm not going to use this. I think that excuse is very juvenile- I used to say that for just about every math class in grade school. I mean, I didn't want to be a mathematician and I certainly don't want to be an accountant or anything. So, I always thought, "why do I have to take this?" Don't lie, you know you thought the same exact thing ;-) Anyways, God stopped me in the middle of my bad attitude and asked me, "If you don't learn how to be faithful in small things, how will you ever remain faithful when I entrust you with bigger things?" SLAP....in the face that is! It all hit me, if I trust that God is in control of my life and in control of every step that I take, then I should trust that I am right where I am suppose to be. Yes, I said it....School is exactly where I am suppose to be. I am perfectly positioned.
I need to be faithful with my school work, because this is exactly where God has me. This season won't last forever. And whether I dread my current season at times, its all for the "greater good." This reminds me of a certain verse in Romans, 8:28 to be exact. "8 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." I trust that God will use what I am learning to help out in seasons to come. It will all work together, I'm sure of it!
Psalm 121:3 is constantly on my heart, "3 He will not let your foot slip-he who watches over you will not slumber." I don't know what the future looks like, but I know that God is not asleep over my life. I need not worry about what is next or how my dreams will come into fruition. Life is about taking it a day at a time. I choose to rest in the sovereignty of God. And if the things that I dream do not come true "to a T", I know that God is able to direct me along the path of His perfect will for my life. So, I say make YOUR dreams my dreams, Lord.
I leave you with a "Kristin-ism":
"At the end of the day, if I didn't get what I wanted it doesn't mean that God has forsaken me. If anything, it should confirm the fact that he is still here. His thoughts and ways are higher, therefore what I wanted is nothing compared to His plans for me."
If I didn't drive my point home, perhaps Britt Nicole's chorus of "Have Your Way" will help me in summation.
"So I'll stop searching for the answers, I'll stop praying for an escape. And I'l trust you God with where I am and believe that you will have your way. Just have your way, just have your way."
-Kristin
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